i don’t think you are ever prepared for all of the emotions surrounding a move.
it seems they come unannounced, obtrusive and inappropriate at times.
this past friday morning, i loaded up the babies and we flew to Midland for the weekend, while the packers came and put everything we own in boxes.
but at 7am when i left, the house was exactly as it always is — i might as well have only been going to the grocery store for some more milk.
even though i KNEW the house was all packed, husband and i were in mid conversation when i came through the door tonight – the same door i’ve dragged sleeping and crying and laughing babies through hundreds of times . . . only to find this:
it took my breath away and i suddenly burst into tears for the first time in a few weeks regarding the move.
there have been times it would have been more appropriate to cry — for example, at our little goodbye shindig where we clung tightly to our dear friends and promised it wasn’t “goodbye” it was only a “see you later!”. after all, we are only going 4 hours away . . .
but no, i didn’t shed a tear. and it wasn’t because it wasn’t sad, because it was. the tears just didn’t come.
then there were other times, where i felt like i was cheating on my current life to even feel a break a smile about the possibilities that await us on the other end of all the boxes . . . because we are aren’t running from anything here. we are simply moving forward.
anyway. it’s midnight, and dark, and the house feels a little stuffy from being shut up all weekend. and there are boxes covering every floor, and frankly, i can’t even think about around now.
but tomorrow is a new day, and it will bring sunshine. and sweat. and lots of “ohhhh, and we can’t forget to do such and such before we get on the road!”
and we’ll greet the loading truck with starbucks and smile at the adventure that lies just a few miles down 45 . . .